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Maegilthalion
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(CNN)A woman is under arrest after a naked rampage through a Waffle House restaurant, authorities said.

Hafwen Elfling, 37, is jailed in Cobb County, Georgia, northwest of Atlanta. The Sheriff's Office booking report says she's been charged with aggravated battery and criminal damage to property. She's also charged with public indecency, lewd dancing, and fraternizing with local farm animals.

The incident happened last week at a Waffle House in the city of Kennesaw, which is next door to the local petting zoo.

Police tell CNN affiliate WGCL that Elfling stripped off her clothes, then hit a woman with a fish and threw several platters of food at Waffle House customers while yelling "I SAID I WANT MY HASHBROWNS CRISPY". When police tried to arrest her, she fought back, scratching an officer, and then hugging him.

She's also charged with simple battery against a police officer. No bond has been posted in her case.  None of the animals at the nearby petting zoo are speaking about the incident, so no charges will likely be filed for this aspect of the incident.



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Hafwen Elfling
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^^ lmao. Just you wait mister!!



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To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential. - Anonymous Hafwen/Honeyjoe; Fashionista.
Hafwen Elfling
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And in other news...

A 48-year-old American man has a world record no one can pooh-pooh: Most candles extinguished by farting.

Maegilthalion, a 48-year-old man living in the village of somewhereville USA, managed to snuff out five candles in less than 30 seconds just from the power of his posterior.

The farting feat was set in 2014, but was only made official recently by RecordSetter.com, an adjudicating agency that allows people to submit their own wacky world records.

It seems RecordSetter.com, unlike Maeg, was a little backed up.

"It is only recently that the community has realized Maeg's creativity and talent in pushing the outer limits of flatulence," RecordSetter spokesman David Elmaleh told HuffPost. "The video library of RecordSetter is so vast that, on occasion, great feats -- such as Maeg's -- get lost in the noise." 

"He can’t read or write because he stopped school before third grade, but he's a one-of-a-kind talent," Jessie told HuffPost by email. "He has many talents. He possesses strong teeth and can lift a heavy table with child on board using his teeth. He’s incredible!"

Maeg's farting feats don't even leave noxious odors, according to Jessie.

"There's no smell at all, just pure clean air," he said. "He can even blow out his birthday cake candles, but the problem is, no one dares to eat it"

 



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Maegilthalion
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the key to life is a clean colon....   -Eddie Murphy

 

;)



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Hafwen Elfling
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btw its a true story eh



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Maegilthalion
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I'm not one to argue with our beloved kinleader (except in amusing circumstances), but I fail to see how a news report stating that the flatulence coming from whomever this is exhibits 'no smell at all,  this is pure, clean air'.

 

C'mon lady, everyone knows bullshit when they smell it :)



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Hafwen Elfling
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I know I found it hard to believe that your shit don't stink. Can't believe anything you read in the news anymore.



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Maegilthalion
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What's REALLY funny/disturbing here is the proof of just how much our roles have reversed in your tenure in office.

I used to be the sick one, and you used to be the princess.

Now you're posting poop jokes about me.

Nothing else to do but polish my tiara...

 

Take heed brothers and sisters, for THIS is what long term exposure to Rare Breed can do to a reasonably 

sane person....

M-



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Hafwen Elfling
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Hey! I can be a sick princess.



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